My Worst Mom Moment Yet...

This weekend was hard.  My husband and I rarely see each other as mentioned in this post, and I think it's really starting to take it's toll. Saturday we were discussing finances and other random things that matter when you're a married couple and it turned into an argument.  We were both getting frustrated and angry with each other and we let our frustration get out of control.   I didn't want to argue with a baby on my hip so I put her in her bedroom to play while we sorted things out.  We're both quite stubborn so neither one of us wanted to budge.... it lasted about 30 minutes.  But those 30 minutes we're pretty intense...  ...now, I know people argue but we made a promise to never expose our daughter it.   So, Olivia played alone in her room for 30 minutes.  That may not sound horrible but when we gave up and gave in, I went into Olivia's room and my poor girl had fallen asleep on her floor. Alone. When I walked into her room and saw my angel asleep on the floor my heart broke into a million pieces and I started sobbing. I felt like a horrible mother.   My husband and I were being selfish and took time away from our daughter to argue about something we really shouldn't have let escalate in the first place. I picked Olivia up and put her down in her crib.  She finished her nap where she should have been, but when she woke up, she was upset.  Really, really upset.  She woke up crying and she never does that.   My girl usually wakes up talking and laughing, but this time, she was scared and sad. Olivia shouldn't have had to hear us argue.  She was probably afraid in her room because we were upset and God knows babies sense tension so I can only imagine how upset that made her.  It took us a while to calm her down.     Believe me, this is not my best Mom moment.  I'm still feeling guilty about it but let me just say, LESSON LEARNED.   I will NEVER, EVER allow that to happen again.   This was my worst Mom moment yet.     

Ugh.

Confession first, we live with my parents. 

My husband, daughter and I live in the same house as my parents

....sometimes, it drives me insane!

When you're starting a family of your own,

you tend to move away from how you grew up and start to make your own rules,

traditions and memories while figuring out what things are truly important to you.

Doing this while living your life in front of an audience is hard.  Really hard sometimes.

Sometimes it's the little things that really bother me.

This may seem trivial but last night, my mother made dinner.  She asked me what I wanted to have, we had Shepards Pie, I asked for this so I could take the leftovers for lunch to work today... 

SHE FED THE LEFTOVERS TO OUR DOGS

Seriously? 

I was kind of angry this morning when I went to make my lunch and there was nothing there. 

Nice Ma, thanks!

She does things like this all the time.  It's like she has no reguard for what someone else wants or needs. 

(Please know that I'm just venting.  My parents help us a LOT and I love them to death.  This just threw me over the edge this morning)

I hope the dogs enjoyed my lunch.