Lately I've been feeling the nudge from God to give. Give more time, money, love, possessions, etc. It's not that I wasn't a giver before, but before there were wrong intentions behind my giving.
It all started back in November. Right before Thanksgiving. That time of year, that season in general, always pulls on my heartstrings. I think of people who are less fortunate, who can't provide for their families, who struggle and it saddens me. As our family is easily planning our large Thanksgiving dinner I realize that there are families out there in my very own community who aren't and can't do the same thing. Then I had an idea and THIS HAPPENED.
Since then its been little things that I've wanted to give. My husband and I bought new furniture for our daughters big girl bedroom and had to get rid of some odds and end pieces that we were using in her room before. We had planned on selling them. Listed them on Craigslist and received some replies, set up a meeting time and place and then once again felt the nudge to give. We felt we were being pushed to not take money for these items just give them away. So we met up with the people who planned on purchasing the furniture from us and we did just that, gave them away. We gave of ourselves because we felt pushed to do so by God.
It's also been little things here and there, paying for the order in the drive thru behind me, doing a chore for my husband and vice versa, watching his favorite show on tv instead of mine (sometimes!).
Most recently my heart was so touched by this encounter. Driving home from work on a cold day I see a young mother with two children - a toddler and a baby, no more than 6 months old. She's walking down a busy main street holding her daughters hand and carrying her baby. She bends down to pick up and carry her toddler who is obviously tired from walking uphill. Immediately I feel the need to give her my stroller.
I'm stuck at the red light and I'm having this conversation with myself all in the matter of minutes...
"I'm crazy! Give her my stroller?"
"We barely use it."
"But what if we need it?"
"Olivia always wants to walk so it should be fine, right?"
"What should I do?"
"She'll think I'm crazy pulling the car over!"
But in those few minutes I knew that God was telling me to do it. To give.
So, the light changed. I drive down the street she's on, pull over, get out and offer her my stroller. She was so appreciative, thankful and humble. In the end she doesn't need it, she has one but can't take it on the city bus. She thanks me and I head home.
I guess the point of this, of me writing it all out, was to try to make some sense of WHY I'm bring pushed and nudged to give. I've been praying about it, to show me why, to help me understand the purpose, for Him to put the right people in my path, to make sure I always give the glory to God.
I guess there are certain things we just won't understand and maybe this is one of them. But, in the meantime, whether I understand His ways or not, I'm going to keep listening.